Have your gestures of love towards your spouse ever fallen flat, leaving you puzzled and frustrated? Dr. Gary Chapman may have the explanation.

In his book “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts,” Dr. Chapman describes the five different ways that humans show love to others, whether in marriage, or in other relationships:

1. Communicating words of affirmation
2. Spending quality time 
3. Giving gifts
4. Doing acts of service
5. Physical touch

What we need to understand, says Dr. Chapman, is that each have us have different needs and desires when it comes giving and receiving expressions of love. We need to discover and use the love language that’s most appropriate for each person. If we don’t, we’ll find that our gestures of love will be unappreciated. And that’s when problems in relationships start.