Do you often feel like your child is a mystery and doesn’t open up emotionally to you as much as you’d like? You aren’t alone. Many of the parents of my youngest patients often ask me for guidance on how to help their children become more open and to share what’s on their minds. Understandably, they are looking for an easy-to-implement solution with instant results. But the key to getting your child to feel secure enough to confide in you is to build a foundation of trust with him. And building that foundation takes time.
“The good news is that it doesn’t matter if we find we have married the wrong person… We need to swap the Romantic view for a tragic (and at points comedic) awareness that every human will frustrate, anger, annoy, madden and disappoint us — and we will (without any malice) do the same to them… Rather than some notional idea of perfect complementarity, it is the capacity to tolerate differences with generosity that is the true marker of the 'not overly wrong' person. Compatibility is an achievement of love; it must not be its precondition." [Read Article]